I was doing the wrong things, in the wrong job, away from home, losing children and marriage and had turned Alcoholic as a result of this desperately wrong path fuelled by ambition and selfishness. Now all has changed and they are back. This was given to me and I hope was constructive, although indeed very purgatorial, but a long process of self-understanding.

I was personally heavily overloaded into hell. A psychiatric clinic (twice) for 3 and 2 weeks. During the first 3 weeks I had enormous experiences all of which I wrote down in an 88 page document. This was very personal and revelatory. I have never shown that to anyone. The second two weeks, due to a very quick regression and relapse into "alcohol abuse" was much worse. Almost a punishment in fact. I now realise that the human psyche needs some kind of shock in order to jolt it into being able to communicate with what at the time I noted as "DIM 5" - a 5th dimension, which I now conclude is "spirit" world

I recall standing somewhat "spaced out" at my back door looking out and having a very strong feeling of being passed through a female birth canal (if that is the correct term) - very powerful indeed.

P.S. Not touched booze for over 5 years now. Too scared! And too alive frankly.