Common steps and sub-activities

Minding your own business

Minding your own business is an attack on the control freak and the know all.

The control freak has such a large ego that they think they always know best. They are constantly preaching to others, constantly giving orders, constantly telling everyone else what to do and think.  They are the ones who ring up the radio or TV to express their opinions, they are the ones who cause misery in families by controlling the children’s behaviour at every stage.  Many religious institutions contain control freaks and many politicians are control freaks too.

They are often very unhappy people with failed lives, which makes it all the more ironic that they feel the need to order others about and tell them what to do.  If what they did was so wonderful, one might ask, how come they are in this mess? 

Much of it is a sign of fear – insecurity, a sort of loneliness and lack of confidence.  By controlling others they think that the fear will go away, it gives them a false sense of security, so theoretically we should feel sorry for them.  But it is difficult to do so because they cause untold misery. 

It is also a very thin dividing line between a control freak and a bully.

And with an ego this large they will never ever get a spiritual experience, not even a nice dream, a small hallucination or a pleasant feeling of bliss.  Zilch, zero.

Method

If you find yourself about to give ‘helpful’ advise.  Stop,  Is your life perfect?

If you find yourself telling others what they ought to be doing.  Stop.  Do you do this?

I appreciate the irony of what I am doing here, but hopefully you can see the logic.

What you think should be done and what you think is good advice is based on your experience, it may be wholly inappropriate for the person you are giving all this advice to.

By all means make suggestions, show the possibilities, but if someone comes to you with tales of woe, sympathise but don’t try to solve the problem, let them solve it by talking it through with you.  Be a sympathetic ear.

How it works

This works in two ways.

If you hold back all the time it helps to still your ego and thus the Will.  It is a gentle form of attrition on your own ego, as you keep on  telling it to ‘keep quiet!’ and to not interfere.

But for the person who is saved from all your unwanted advice, it saves them from being flooded with your belief systems.  It means that they don’t have to keep on using Questioning and doubting all beliefs, they get a rest!  For you are imposing your beliefs on them,  and as they may be wholly wrong, you have also imposed your will on them. 

Observations

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