Voices from the Womb – Four Mothers Tell About Prebirth Communication

Pamela’s Story – A Brief Visit from a Little Soul

I had always wanted to have children, so when I finally married at 36, we decided to start a family right away, says Pamela. Three months later, when I still wasn’t pregnant, my husband Andrew and I went for tests. The news came back that we would both need infertility treatment. I also had to inject myself with hormones, and in the days just before ovulation, my doctor did scans to watch the eggs ripening. But month after month there was no good news.

Then one sunny September afternoon, about a week after ovulation, Andrew and I were out in the country walking among the spring flowers. Suddenly, for no reason I can explain, I said to him, “Implantation just happened – I am pregnant!” I don’t know how I knew. I just knew. It was as if there was a luminous ‘presence’ with me. Part of me kept thinking I was making this up, but in the days that followed I discovered I was indeed pregnant.

Apart from the physical confirmation of the pregnancy (which was without other symptoms except for a metallic taste in my mouth) the most wonderful part of the experience was the feeling there was a ‘person’, with me. I was floating on a cloud; so happy I couldn’t believe it was true. I also had more energy than usual, and spring-cleaned the house from top to bottom.

It wasn’t just me who was feeling excited either – we went to a “Design for Living” exhibition, and I couldn’t tear Andrew away from train sets and teddy bears. When he was a child he had asked his mother for a big teddy bear but been given a small one. His child was going to have the biggest teddy bear he could find! And regardless of whether it was a boy or a girl, it seemed our child was going to have a train set too!

All went well, and I started buying baby clothes, even though it was still very early days. Then one Sunday evening, I went to bed feeling a little strange. In the night I dreamed I gave birth and I saw the baby’s face clearly. It was a very touching dream, but when I woke, the ‘presence’ of the child was gone.

I phoned Andrew at work and told him, “The baby has left. It’s not with me anymore”. He told me not to be negative, but I knew that the ‘presence’ had gone. Much later in the day I started bleeding, so I called him again and said that it really was over. He was very upset and told me once more not to be negative as a woman can have some bleeding, but not lose the baby. But I knew it was over, and it was.

I know that it is normal to grieve deeply at the loss of a baby, even early in the pregnancy, but for some strange reason, though my husband took it very badly, it was easier for me. I will never forget the experience. I just felt incredibly blessed that a little soul had been with me for those few short wonderful weeks. It was like being visited by an angel!