Common steps and sub-activities

Reducing opportunities - eliminating harmless pleasures

Against this list of pleasures tick all those that do not cause obsessive thoughts, in effect any pleasures that are just nice things that happen to you and you are happy to have if they come, but you don’t spend a lot of time worrying yourself or scheming if they don’t.  Brussels sprouts for example.  I like brussel sprouts but I don’t obsess about them.

A harmless pleasure is one where if it happens it happens, if it doesn’t then there is really nothing to worry about, if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t.

What you should now be left with are the things you obsess about and here is where the damage occurs.  Because if we obsess about something that has given us pleasure of a very heightened kind, or that we think may give us pleasure, then we are liable to spend our whole time scheming and organising our lives and creating opportunities to get it.  And if it isn’t there, we spend all our time agonising over the fact that it isn’t there.

My list is simple.

Chocolate and love [not sex, love]. 

Pleasure

Obsession?

A plate of fish and chips now and again

NO

A caravan holiday in Scarborough every year

NO

Sex every Sunday morning

NO

Warmth [never being cold]

NO

A warm bath every Friday night

NO

Two children

NO

My dog

NO

Reading fiction novels

NO

Watching nature programmes

NO

Walking in the country

NO

Sailing

NO

Dancing

NO

Cuddling my dog

NO

Ruffling husband’s hair

NO

Brussel sprouts

NO

Chocolate

YES

Being loved, giving love

YES