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Terrifying Shadow

My name is Marjorie Fanshaw
And I’m a rather cautious sort
My husband says I’m spineless
And I ‘run a mile at nought’

It was a winter evening
That my dreadful tale unfolds
It was cold and dark and dreary
I’d been to Tesco for some rolls

I was walking back along the road
Because I’d missed the bus
I ‘spose I could have rung my husband
But I’m not one to make a fuss

The road was dark and silent
In the distance sirens whined
And the street lamps cast an eerie glow
Sent shivers down my spine

I was coming up to West street
On the corner of our block
When a TERRIFYING SHADOW
A truly TERRYIFYING SHADOW
A dreadful dreadful shadow
Gave me an awful shock

The shadow was of someone
[Impossible I thought
My husband’s willy’s very small
Sometimes it’s vainly sought]

This man was quite enormous
Should I run or should I wait?
So I lay down on the pavement
And bravely waited for my fate

Well I closed my eyes and raised my skirt
I braced myself for pain
But the feeling was quite pleasant
In fact I wanted it again

But when I opened up my eyes
The shadow man was gone
So I picked up my rolls from Tesco
And gaily skipped back home