Type of spiritual experienceHallucination
A description of the experience
The experience happened as a result of a weightlifting accident. Prior to the event, I had just finished with the football season where I was fortunate enough to win a national championship; the accident happened during the post season. At that time, I was the strongest football player on the team without question. Having 405 pounds of real weight on the bench press quite frankly didn't take much effort, and it was a weight that I was able to control easily. On the end of the bar I had bands that helped to suspend the weight in the air so it was easier to lift alone. As I was resting underneath the bar in between sets, an individual passed by my bar carrying dumbbells and lost his footing causing him to fall into my bar. The bar then disracked and fell on my forehead breaking my sinus cavity. Because of the bands, the bar then bounced back up and came down again on my nose and the side of my face, resulting in my nose being fractured in four places, and me breaking my orbitial socket. With one arm, I threw the weight off of my face, and stood up as blood began pouring out of my nose. The staff called the ambulance, and I was then taken to the hospital.
At the hospital, my parents met me and I was told the hospital couldn't help. I was taken to another hospital. During this entire time, I was losing blood and wasn't able to drink water because they said I could choke on the water if I threw up. I was rushed into surgery and put under by anesthesia for the operation. During the surgery, I completely left this plane of reality and arrived at the highest plane of consciousness.
Immediately I understood that I had died because of the accident. I had reviewed my life in its entirety, and was completely surrounded by infinite darkness. It felt as if all burdens were lifted and I was in complete tranquility. I was surrounded by what felt like a warm rushing wind that entered into the core of my consciousness. Also I had complete understanding of my actions and those of others within my life, and the only sadness I had was that the people I loved couldn't join me in this place of pure happiness. There was no sense of time.
It should also be noted that much of what we associate to self status such as clothes and personal identity didn't matter in the least. My individual self was no longer contained by the limits of the body vessel, and I was able to move through this vast darkness by will alone. In the darkness, it felt as if I was being pulled toward something much greater than myself. Suddenly the words, "Though I walk through the valley of death, I fear no evil for the Lord is with me..." began continuously repeating within my consciousness. Because I had no sense of the time, it seemed as if it was one event after another.
I recall periods of simply moving through the darkness toward whatever was internally pulling me. Then out of the corner of my "eye" I saw the silhouette of radiating light that appeared as an open door with a rounded top. In this doorway I saw two figures on the edge of the doors facing one another, almost acting like guards to the door way. As I approached the illuminated doorway, a thunderous male's voice echoed throughout the darkness and told me "Nicholas, it is not your time". Immediately it felt as if I was lifted up and thrown backward. I literally felt like I "fell" through each level of consciousness until I reached this plane where my human body existed.
Suddenly I opened my eyes to see that I was in a hospital bed and began crying hysterically. My parents told me that I kept repeating myself and asking, "Why was I sent back to this world filled with pain and suffering." Needless to say, the doctors responded by assuming my pain was literal and filled me with narcatoic drugs which caused me to pass out. This kept repeatedly happening until a smiling old woman who I had never seen before came into my room while I was alone; she carried a rosary. She sat on my bed and said, "Hello Nicholas, would you like to pray with me?" I responded absolutely. We began praying the 'our father prayer' and when we were done I asked if we could pray a hail mary. After we were done, I asked her where she was from, and she told me. It is interesting to note that she was from the town where my grandfather was born and where my family moved to when they came to America. My cell phone began vibrating so I looked over at it for just a split second. When I returned my attention back to the woman, she was gone and my door was closed. After a while, a nurse came in, and I questioned her about the woman who was in my room. She told me that no one had entered my room all morning, and the hospital hasn't had nuns or individual prayer services since the 1960s.